Written in the wake of the Atlanta Spa Shootings in 2021, I found myself reeling. I had just released To the Dawn and was feeling better about myself, when two days later the news broke. As I continued to wrestle with my newly-understood identity of “Asian American,” the headlines continued to tell me of the increase in anti-asian violence and sentiment. Eventually the news “3800 Anti Asian hate incidents” broke and I didn’t know what to do.
This song is a moment of vulnerability—a plea for continued relationship while I did everything I could to exist while in the midst of a deep depression. It’s a confession of hopelessness, fear and doubt.